Today I visited the farmer's market on University Avenue.
Still much the same, but 1 new big difference is a retail products stand that I'm guessing is run by Sun Foods (imported produce & treats/drinks).
I stared down the street a couple of times and thought, "This is it. This is its last summer of peace before everything I see goes away. I should come again. A lot more."
Looking the other way, I thought, "Big Daddy's
Saturday Barbecue! I still haven't eaten there. And where else did I mean to go each time I said I should come & shop here before it's gone?"
On my way out of the neighborhood, I thought about how I hadn't bought any Big Daddy's because it's out of my food budget. I wondered if I would end up doing all those money-spending activities that it's my "last chance" for. I wondered if there was any point--is a 1x taste of new-to-me, good food worth breaking my budget for?
I missed Art Song's original BBQ shack, apparently--and although there's a sign that reminds me of that all the time--my life is going on despite it. Wouldn't it go on if I never tried Big Daddy's or bought any clothes at one of the tailor shops?
Then I moved on to: What did I do all that protest work for? Was I misguided? 95% of the neighborhood is things I don't & won't spend money on.
Maybe I felt like it was worth working for the 100% to save the 5% I do patronize.
Or maybe I felt like it was worth working for the 100% to save the 10-15% I'd patronize if I lived there (which I have in the past).
Besides the "because what's happening to 'them' isn't fair" part. That was there. I'm trying to reach in and find the "me" that made that particular crusade important.
Photos can't capture it, and my memory's not a steel trap. But maybe I'll meditate on the heat and the wind and the sound and the 3-D and the smell after I finish this post so I can commit it to memory better than I usually do.
Other thoughts as I arrived closer to home:
What the f*** is up with my -isms? I don't "deserve" a lawn and a garden and a lack of retail right outside my bedroom and a convenient bus line (but not right outside my bedroom) all put together any more than anyone else on this earth. But I expect it.
Ditto my job. I doubt we people like me "deserve" a cushy job that makes a neighborhood like that, and a reliable car, possible. But damned if I don't expect it and keep it off the brain most every day. I guess it'd kinda suck not to fit the mold. Maybe the way I didn't fit the mold & felt "under watch" as a corporate secretary; maybe differently. Hm. I don't know where next to go w/ the thought, but it came to me. I guess it's going, now.
Naptime. And ****load of fresh veggies to prep & cook time. Yikes.
P.S. Today is AWESOME!!!! I love heat!!!!!!!!
Saturday, July 16
Today I visited the farmer's market on University Avenue.
Recent headlines from the blog "Black and Missing but Not Forgotten:"
Blogroll (click to expand)
- Abu Aardvark (Marc Lynch, Arabic-language media specialist)
- Affordable Housing Institute: US (David Smith, aff. hous. specialist)
- Alice Dredger's blog (bioethics, sex, & gender specialist)
- An Iraqi expatriate dentist's blog (USA/Jordan)
- Badgerbag (a liberal urban feminist hippie geek's blog (I swear she could be a real-life friend of mine))
- Bagdhad Chronicles (an Iraqi citizen's blog)
- Black And Missing...But Not Forgotten
- Candle In the Dark (an American soldier's blog)
- Chan'ad Bahraini (Bahraini issues blog)
- Citizen Orange (description pending)
- Darvish (Sufi religious and personal blog)
- Days Of My Life (an Iraqi dentist's daughter's blog)
- Democracy Center (Jim Schultz, Bolivian political specialist)
- Emotions... (an Iraqi dentist's blog)
- Eteraz (Muslim & political issues group blog)
- Fetch Me My Axe (feminist and social issues blog)
- Finnegan's Wake-Up Call (an American IMPACT instructor's blog)
- Full Circle blog (online interaction strategy for organizations)
- Genius Is As Genius Does (feminist and teenage issues blog)
- Good Girl: a Look at How Women are Taught to Behave
- Grandma Was a Suffragette (feminist issues blog)
- Haroon Moghul (old, discontinued blog)
- Hathor Legacy (feminist sarcastic wit about current events and culture)
- Having Read the Fine Print (women of color issues and personal blog)
- Having Read the Fine Print... (feminist theory and racial issues/theory blog)
- History Unfolding (David Kaiser, preventive war specialist)
- I'm Not a Feminist, But... (feminist issues blog)
- In Beijing (an environmentalist geeky American in China's blog)
- Justice for Women (Catholic and feminist issues blog)
- Latino Político (description pending)
- Latína Lísta (description pending)
- Lenin's Tomb (Richard Seymour, socialist policy and political commentator)
- Natural Athlete of Unnatural Strength (Kat Ricker, bodybuilder)
- Of América (Latin@ issues blog)
- On the Soapbox (political and social issues and technology blog)
- Or Does It Explode... (Muslim & Arab political issues critiqued from a pretty Western perspective)
- Packaging Girlhood (well-balanced blog of the book's authors)
- Persephone's Box (parenting issues and feminist theory blog)
- Problem Chylde (description pending)
- Progressive Islam: Sheep Are for 'Eid (Muslim, social, & political issues group blog)
- Quaker Agitator (education and social issues blog)
- Real Men Are Not... (masculinity issues blog)
- Reappropriate (gaming and social issues blog)
- Reasons to take IMPACT-style classes
- Respect Rx (advice column by the book's authors)
- Secret Asian Man (cartoons joking about racial issues)
- Sex and the Umma (fiction exploring Muslim social issues)
- Shameless Magazine (well-balanced blog of a print feminist magazine)
- Shrub.com (well-balanced gaming and feminist issues blog)
- Sly Civilian (social issues blog)
- State-of-the-art Self Defense Training For Women (informational Myspace page)
- Stumptuous (Krista Scott-Dixson, weight training advice guru)
- The Angry Black Woman (women of color issues and personal blog)
- The Sanctuary (migrant issues group blog)
- The Unapologetic Mexican (mostly chican@ and social issues blog)
- Thinking Girl (feminist issues and personal blog)
- Unwilling Self-Negation (Ali Eteraz's old blog)
- UroStream (an American urologist's blog)
- Vivir Latino (description penging)
- Vortex(t) (social issues and feminist theory blog)
- When Fangirls Attack! (link lists to articles about women in comics)
- Women of Strength (Livejournal community)
- Writeous Sister Speaks (racial and religious issues blog)
- Zuky (social issues and music blog)